The Hitchhiker

by The Urban Cowboy on June 23, 2010 · 71 comments

Anne was a single 29 year old with a successful career in photography. Her passion of capturing life’s moments frozen in time ensured her own would never be still, always on the road for her next assignment. Luckily, her father’s residence in New Mexico would at times provide the perfect refuge for impromptu family reunions between gigs.

Living in Arizona most of her adult life, Anne’s father, Joe, had moved after the accident which took her mother’s life. Everyone complimented Anne on her uncanny resemblance to her mother, Donna. At five foot 6 inches tall, fiery red hair, and freckles gracing her ivory skin, Anne would be pursued, but never caught.

Anne was promiscuous to the tenth degree; she loved the excitement of someone new, his smell, his taste, the unknown, even if it would only last the night. Her friends always felt she pushed the envelope; she was even labeled by some as a risk taker. She didn’t care though, and really thought it more of a compliment than anything else.

Packing for her next assignment, Anne’s iPhone blared out an annoying alarm one imagines as a submarine begins to submerge.

The Hitchhiker

the hitchhiker

…a something wicked this way comes sort of look made its way from her face…

“Hi dad, what’s up?”

“I received your email, so you’re gonna be passing through here tomorrow?”

“Sure will, and…I’m taking a full two days to spend with you.”

“Great! ‘Bout time you stayed longer than a nights sleep. Have you planned your route? I don’t want you taking any back roads…you hear? Stay on the freeway, OK?”

“Oh dad, I’ll be fine…I’ve made this trip many times before, and will be making it many more to come…and anyways, I only take I10.”

“Just be careful hon, I tell ya, it’s a crazy fuckin’ world…and you’re all I got left. Lord knows if your mother was still…”

“I know…I know, but I really have to finish packing if I’m going to make it to your place in time.”

“OK, be safe and give your old man a call sometime along the way…just to let me know your safe, OK?”

“You know it pops!”

“Love ya, AnnaBannana!”

“Love you back…times two, Joe..kster!”

Anne hung up and tossed her phone onto the bed that never gets made. Memories of her mother singing the phrase AnnaBannana would always bring a smile to her lips, no matter how she really felt. Even though it had been 20 years since her mother’s accident, she never talked about it with anyone, not even her father.

It was too painful for her.

Crossing the border into New Mexico at 2AM, Anne was traveling along 70, not I10 like she promised her father. The road seemed desolate, not another vehicle in either direction and far from the lights of the city. She didn’t mind, it was relaxing with all the brightly lit stars above.

The pavement now humming under her tires, an overwhelming feeling of restlessness sent waves through her skin. Then she saw him. A lone figure on the side of the road, arm outstretched, thumb signaling for a friend in the dark, she knew she had to pick him up, this hitchhiker.

Climbing in the car, the lone stranger introduced himself as Dan as he placed a beat up guitar and a back pack onto the back seat.

“Well Dan, my name is Anne…and you’re pretty lucky that anyone is driving at this time.”

“Yea, I know…must be my lucky night, huh?”

“Could be,” Anne replied with a hint of flirtatious desire.

“Nooo, you don’t understand, it isss my lucky night,” Dan retorted with a sinister, animalistic glance.

As the tone in Dan’s voice implied danger, the 10 inch bone handled knife now brought it home.

“If you want to live you’ll do exactly what I say, understand, bitch? Now drive.”

Numbness overtook Anne, unable to speak let alone yell, this reaction Dan had seen before, surmising she was in total shock. A grim smile on his face now gave away the dark and ugly intentions that he had in store for her, this will be an easy one, he thought silently.

Driving for only a couple miles, Dan now motioned her to take a right off the road onto a dirt road. Anne, complying, imagined what scenario Dan planned for her. At the end of the road, there was a small but secluded clearing.

This was the end of the road.

As the car came to a stop, Dan reached over and grabbed the keys.

“Get your ass out, now!”

“What do you want, I’ll do anything…”

“What do I want…what do I want…what the hell you think I want…I want you doin what the hell I say, and only what I say…now get out!”

“Are you the…”

“The wha…the West Mesa killa? So what if I am, when I’m done with you, you’re gonna beg me to finish the job,” Dan spoke coldly as he struck Anne in the head, knocking her to the ground.

As Anne came into contact with the hard ground, something changed. Looking up at her attacker, a something wicked this way comes sort of look made its way from her face into his soul.

“What, you like it rough?” Dan asked, perplexed by the apparent joy his helpless victim was now exuding.

“No, I’m just glad I finally met ya is all.”

“Wha…”

“I’ve been dreaming about this,” Anne snarled, lifting herself up, pointing a nickel plated 45 that reflected a sliver of the moonlight into Dan’s eyes.

“Now throw your knife over there,” she demanded, motioning to the other side of the car.

Speechless, or possibly in shock himself, Dan threw the knife.

“Now lay on your stomach, you piece of shit!”

Laying face down in the dirt, Dan’s mind was racing for an answer out of this predicament. Somehow, someway, he knew his instinct for survival would deliver him from this. What he didn’t count on is Anne’s desire for revenge was greater.

“Bet you didn’t expect this, did ya tough guy?”

The smell of her perfume, her lips grazing his ear, Dan’s senses were reeling as her words taunted him. Then the clink of handcuffs sent shivers through his scalp as she cuffed his right wrist to his right ankle, and the same for his left side. It was at that moment Dan realized the hunter was really the prey.

Anne sat down, a glassy stare aimed at this wretched thing society calls a man. Her thoughts turn to the ‘accident’ of her mother. How she was raped, tortured, then beaten to death when she was only 9 years old. How the only time she can reveal her feelings about it is right before she extinguishes the life from another pathetic excuse of a person that preys on defenseless women.

“This is my therapy, you know? When I’m able to take one of you off the streets for good…it makes me happy again…for a while.”

Anne would rape the ear of her would be murderer with her story for the next hour.

An excited Joe answered the door to his only daughter, standing there beaming a huge smile. Hugging, Joe couldn’t help but see his wife whenever he looked at Anne.

“How was your trip Banana?”

“Awesome, I even ran into someone I’ve been looking for for a long time.”

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The Urban Cowboy

"Now remember, when things look bad and it looks like you're not gonna make it, then you gotta get mean. I mean plumb, mad-dog mean. 'Cause if you lose your head and you give up then you neither live nor win. That's just the way it is." Yippee ki-yay...

The Urban Cowboy has written 180 articles for The Urban Cowboy!

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{ 71 comments… read them below or add one }

Alex aka Ma What's For Dinner June 23, 2010 at 3:49 am

Oh wow…that was awesome. Definitely took a turn I wasn’t expecting. I hate to say he had it coming…but he did!

Lots of yummy love,
Alex aka Ma, What’s For Dinner
http://www.mawhats4dinner.com

Reply

The Urban Cowboy June 23, 2010 at 1:43 pm

You could say he received what he deserved.

Kari Anne June 23, 2010 at 4:26 am

I had a feeling that is what happened to her mom. Another great story! I love going through your short stories and finding more to read… Keep up the great work!

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The Urban Cowboy June 23, 2010 at 1:44 pm

Thanks, as long as someone will read, I’ll try to keep ‘em coming!

Michele June 23, 2010 at 4:38 am

Very interesting. Brought back memories of hitchhiking in the 70s. We always thought it was safe.

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The Urban Cowboy June 23, 2010 at 1:46 pm

There was a lot of things we thought were safe back in the 70′s and even 80′s. They really weren’t, but we didn’t have the media we have now.

Ramona June 23, 2010 at 5:33 am

Man, the chills and goosebumps are still rolling down my arms and legs.

Awesome, freakin’ awesome. I really liked this one! Anne is exactly what I don’t ever want to be “a victim”.

Ramona

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The Urban Cowboy June 23, 2010 at 1:48 pm

Hi Ramona, I love hearing when someone gets goosebumps or chills. Makes my freakin’ day! Have a great one!

Donna (Texas) June 23, 2010 at 6:43 am

Wow….LOVED it! Sick puppy on a Mission!Lolol…..You Go Girl!
Great story Big Guy…
hughugs

Reply

The Urban Cowboy June 23, 2010 at 1:48 pm

Hugs back at you Donna! Always good to see you pop in.

Lisa S. June 23, 2010 at 6:54 am

More please. I’ll bet you can flesh this some.

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The Urban Cowboy June 23, 2010 at 1:49 pm

Lol…I will do my best Lisa, thanks for stopping by.

Talon June 23, 2010 at 7:05 am

I enjoyed this story, Urban Cowboy. There are times when it has to be completely satisfying to take the law into your own hands. Anna definitely had cause to become a vigilante. How horrific it would be to grow up without your Mom knowing what she had suffered.

Reply

The Urban Cowboy June 23, 2010 at 1:52 pm

Hi Talon, I suppose there might be times when anyone can relate to the satisfaction that might be gained by taking the law into their own hands, if only in our thoughts. Yes, it would be a nightmare to have to experience something of this magnitude, for sure.

Shelle-BlokThoughts June 23, 2010 at 7:23 am

Amazing. Simply amazing.

I didn’t see the twist at all. I thought she was done for… another hitchhiker story, same ol’ boring ending. Or just same ending in some cases.

Great twist. Loved it!

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The Urban Cowboy June 23, 2010 at 1:53 pm

Thanks Shelle! Glad you enjoyed the twist!

UP June 23, 2010 at 8:44 am

Yikes! Vengance, ya gotta love it!
Another good one, again jealous, keep it UP!

UP

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The Urban Cowboy June 23, 2010 at 1:57 pm

Hi UP…the only way she could deal with what happened to her mother was through vengeance. Right or wrong, it was her therapy.

brian June 23, 2010 at 9:14 am

holy crap! that was good! justice blows on the wind eh?

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The Urban Cowboy June 23, 2010 at 1:58 pm

I love it…I got a “holy crap” from brian! Right on, glad you liked it!

shrinky June 23, 2010 at 10:44 am

Whoo-hoo, now this is what I call a real feel good post (grin), nothing like seeing when the baddie gets his! She is definitely my kinda’ gal. You are quite the scribe, my friend, great writing.

Reply

The Urban Cowboy June 23, 2010 at 1:59 pm

Hi shrinky, you just gave me a real feel good comment (grinning back)!

Skye June 23, 2010 at 12:47 pm

Oooh, creepy!

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The Urban Cowboy June 23, 2010 at 2:06 pm

Haha…I like creepy. Thanks for stopping by Skye!

Poppy June 23, 2010 at 11:44 am

This is the first short story of yours I have had the pleasure of reading. I’m totally hooked! You have a new fan.

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The Urban Cowboy June 23, 2010 at 2:01 pm

Right on Poppy! I too, have become a fan of yours.

Ann June 23, 2010 at 11:56 am

Awesome story. You had me sitting on the edge of my seat. I was as surprised as Dan was by the turn of events

Reply

The Urban Cowboy June 23, 2010 at 2:02 pm

He had no clue what was in store for him, that’s for sure. Glad you liked it Ann!

Dutch Donut Girl June 23, 2010 at 12:20 pm

Thrilling story.
My kind of girl.

Reply

The Urban Cowboy June 23, 2010 at 2:04 pm

Hi Dutch Donut Girl, I think she’s a lot people’s “kind of girl”

Patti June 23, 2010 at 2:29 pm

Oooh, revenge. If he hadn’t been a scumbag himself, I might have felt sorry for him, but “he had it coming, he had it coming, he only had himself to blame…”

(I sing much better on the Internet.)

Reply

The Urban Cowboy June 23, 2010 at 3:00 pm

Haha, feel free to sing here all you want Patti!

Debby June 23, 2010 at 3:02 pm

Wow, that was a good read!

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The Urban Cowboy June 23, 2010 at 3:35 pm

Glad you enjoyed it Debby!

Vixen June 23, 2010 at 5:56 pm

Wow. GREAT story! Was wondering where you were going with the ending. Loved it. :)

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The Urban Cowboy June 23, 2010 at 7:58 pm

Hi Vixen, glad you liked it!

kristin June 23, 2010 at 7:26 pm

Wow. I love how your writing is as if a tapestry of color and woven together intricately in short story suspense, turn and great ending.

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The Urban Cowboy June 23, 2010 at 8:00 pm

Welcome kristin! :)

christina June 23, 2010 at 9:25 pm

All I can say is “YOU GO GIRL”. I am a strong supporter of revenge in circumstances like what happened to her mother, a strong supporter.

Great Story!

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The Urban Cowboy June 24, 2010 at 7:46 am

LOL…Hi christina! I would definitely rather hear something like this in the news, it would make my day. Glad you liked it!

Julliette O (LarvK) June 23, 2010 at 11:38 pm

Hey cowboy, you write well and from a fellow Spacecowgirl stop by sometime. I liked this one :)

Reply

The Urban Cowboy June 24, 2010 at 7:47 am

Welcome Julliette! I will definitely be stopping by. So glad you liked it!

Stacy (the Random Cool Chick) June 24, 2010 at 4:29 am

Love that there was a twist and not simply twisted… ;) He definitely deserved what he got! Nicely done! :)

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The Urban Cowboy June 24, 2010 at 7:50 am

Hi Cool Chick! LOL…I guess some of my others are a little twisted. :) So glad you enjoyed it!

Ocean Girl June 24, 2010 at 5:30 am

Wow (what I really want to say is holy crap, just like Brian). You did it again.

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The Urban Cowboy June 24, 2010 at 7:51 am

Right on Ocean Girl! I’ll take a holy crap any day! Glad you liked it.

MommaKiss June 24, 2010 at 8:16 am

what a great gift you have, that was an incredible story!

Reply

The Urban Cowboy June 24, 2010 at 8:47 am

Glad you enjoyed it MommaKiss, and thanks for the comp!

christiejolulu June 24, 2010 at 11:21 am

Wow freakin awsome! Loved it!

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The Urban Cowboy June 24, 2010 at 2:17 pm

Awesome…glad you enjoyed it!

Julliette O (LarvK) June 24, 2010 at 9:47 am

Hiya Cowboy! Trying to figure out how to follow you…i guess i should just add the link haha…i’ll bee seeing matey!

Reply

The Urban Cowboy June 24, 2010 at 2:16 pm

Welcome back Julliette! Stop on by anytime!

Jessica June 24, 2010 at 3:16 pm

Ah! I loved it.

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The Urban Cowboy June 24, 2010 at 8:11 pm

Right on Jessica!

TechnoBabe June 24, 2010 at 1:26 pm

I remember the days when we picked up hitchhikers. It was just the kind thing to do. As more things happened to people who picked up strangers, we stopped doing the kind thing. Too dangerous. You did a really good job with the twists and turns in the story.

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The Urban Cowboy June 24, 2010 at 2:19 pm

I used to pick up hitchhikers to…for a while. You’re right, the more news about incidents happening from picking up strangers, the less I did it. Glad you liked the twists!

Christina June 24, 2010 at 1:51 pm

By the way when I was young and we would travel my Dad would always pick up hitchhikers in uniform (military uniform). I can always remember he would pull over and say “son, I will give you a ride if you behave yourself around my family but if you dont, it will turn out badly for you”. They never saw the loaded pistol daddy he would slip under his leg as a “just in case”. I always admired him for that but I wouldnt do it for anything nowadays.

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The Urban Cowboy June 24, 2010 at 2:21 pm

Very smart dad, and very cool of him to pick up soldiers! Nowadays, it’s unfortunate that it is a pretty unsafe thing to do. What with all the imposter’s and stuff.

Raven June 25, 2010 at 8:30 am

An amazing story Urban Cowboy! I love Anne, she is fabulous!

Reply

The Urban Cowboy June 25, 2010 at 10:19 am

I’m a little jealous of Anne…I always wanted to be fabulous…yes she really is. Thanks Raven!

WebSavvyMom June 25, 2010 at 11:46 am

–>WHEW. I was getting nervous there in the middle but liked how it ended. Great story and thanks for sharing.
~deb

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The Urban Cowboy June 25, 2010 at 12:43 pm

Hey there WebSavvyMom, glad you enjoyed it, especially the ending!

Michelle June 25, 2010 at 3:27 pm

Oh my gosh, this story sent shivers through my body!! How awesomely suspensful!! I’m adding you to my blogroll so I can see when you update! :) )

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The Urban Cowboy June 25, 2010 at 5:36 pm

Glad you liked it Michelle, it always feels good to be ‘listed’. ;)

Michelle H. June 26, 2010 at 5:34 pm

So awesome! You have a way with twist endings. I absolutely love those! The unexpected is what always holds my interest.

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The Urban Cowboy July 16, 2010 at 5:25 am

Hi Michelle, glad you like twist endings!

Megan (Best of Fates) July 7, 2010 at 1:50 pm

Ooh, I loved the twist.

I was worried I was going to have a panic attack before she pulled out the gun!

p.s.~ Whoa, absolutely adore the “directly to my comment” reply option – how did you get that?

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The Urban Cowboy July 16, 2010 at 5:28 am

Hi Megan, see my post It has been brought to my attention where I explain how I made the change.

Rose July 15, 2010 at 10:27 pm

I stumbled upon your blog from another blog. Wow, you write very well. A chilling story indeed.

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The Urban Cowboy July 16, 2010 at 5:29 am

Welcome Rose, and thank you for the comp! I will be sure to be stopping by later this evening.

Rose July 16, 2010 at 11:36 am

My pleasure. :)

Reply

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