Monday Mavericks: Eat, Pray and Huh?????

Welcome to The Urban Cowboy’s Monday Mavericks! Every Monday, I welcome a guest to post whatever they like, right here, for your enjoyment. First will be a brief Q&A, followed by their post.

This Monday’s Maverick, I bring to you The Invisible Seductress.

1. How long have you been actively blogging?
I have been blogging since October of 2009. I actually dated a guy for a few weeks and he brought me over a computer one night because I did not have one. The next day he called to say that he was still living with and had decided to get back with his soon to be ex-wife. The computer made a wonderful parting gift!!

2. Why did you start blogging?
I have always loved the written word. I even write comedy routines in the middle of the night when I can’t sleep. I always wake up knowing I was hilarious and the world should experience my comedic genius, but I can never read my writing. I vow to make up the loss of this vital humor to the world by blogging and falling down for no reason!

3. If you could do one thing, right now, regardless of cost or repercussions of any kind, what would it be?
This one stumped me because I can’t get past the vision of me flipping my hair on stage while wearing a ridonkulously sequined red evening gown and pulling the microphone over to say: I would secure WORLD PEACE and spay and neuter animals because I always wanted to be a vegetarian!!!

4. Do you like cowboys? Why or why not?
Oh my, I do love a real cowboy! I had always dated rocker boys, but the first guy that really broke my heart was a cowboy. He even said “A cowboy will never break your heart”. When I freeze dried him people asked questions, but I always knew I wanted to have a cowboy in my life from then on and couldn’t take any chances.

5. What is the ultimate goal you wish to achieve through blogging?
I want people to know that it is OK to be quirky and laugh at yourself. I will share anything if I think it will help someone to smile each day. If they have milk squirt out of their nose while reading my posts,,,,SCORE!!

6. Which ONE word do you feel best describes you?
Sparkly

7. Which ONE word do you think your friends would use to best describe you?
Certifiable

8. What is your favorite food?
Green Olives and Circus Peanuts are dear to my heart!

9. What is your favorite drink?
What I wouldn’t do for a cold Mt. Dew…

10. What is one of your favorite blogs to visit, that isn’t The Urban Cowboy, and why?
That’s such a hard question! I have so many favorites that I read for so many different pay offs. Motivational, humor, warm fuzzies, actual fuzzies….. I have formed blog relationships here and stalk a lot of bloggers. I don’t have very much in the way of family so people that open their hearts up and contact me to see where I am if I miss a day in posting really touch me! Rawkyn Robyn at: Life by Chocolate is one who I have adopted for her crazy style and true heart.

BONUS: Is there anything you would like to say?
Just a hearty THANK YOU to everyone in the blogosphere!! They do such a great job at sharing themselves by writing and participating on the blogs of others. What a gift it is to have this outlet enjoy and grow from as a writer!! And then I would say: Please support your local Circus Peanut farmer!

Eat, Pray, Love

I saw a promo for the movie “Eat, Pray, Love”. As I understand it, the premise of this book/movie is a woman “finding” herself while traversing the world. I am sure that there are millions of us “everyday” people that can directly relate to being able to leave everything behind after a rough patch to view first hand the wonders of this amazing planet.

{{{{crickets}}}}

Am I to be so in awe of her actually pshawing the demons of carbs and enjoying pasta in the place where it originated? If you do not have inspirational revelations while taking in the unique aroma, textures and culture of places many can only dream about, then you really should just hang out at Chuck-E-Cheese and have a slice whist experiencing the “culture” of real stress and the humming of daily mediocrity.

I have not seen the movie or read the book and I am sure I am missing HUGE gaps in this plot. I do not mean to undermine a well-written script, but it does beg to question where the real “finding yourself” moments actually exist in life. For me, hiding behind humor has been vital to survival. It is my feathery sexy security blanket in this masquerade ball we all dance in.

When I look back on the traveling I have done to get over heartbreak, the Caravan always ends up at Wal-Mart where I am buying SPAM and paper towels. I seem to end up walking behind someone with the words “sexy” scrolled across her pink sweat-panted rear, trying to hold on to 1,000 cosmetic items with her 3 inch fake zebra nails. This is hardly a kin to hanging with an elephant in India, but still prophetic in the way that I understand THAT girl’s life is rolling out before her with questions and dilemmas just like mine and I have no right to judge (laugh and question styling choices-maybe, judge-no).

My life sucks right now, plain and simple, I won’t go into details other than to say I am scared out of my wits. I have friends that in knowing my situation still call me for “major” problems in their life. I love this because it challenges me to a saintly level of empathy.

This is a snippet of an actual conversation:

“My hair extensions are destroying my hair and I think this is the last time I can get them done, its $1500 a pop you know!!! And then (dramatic pause) I have to color and trim on top of that!!!”

“That’s AWFUL!!! Whatever are you going to do?” I say while rubbing her Hilfiger sweater.

It’s these moments when I understand that even though this scenario and it’s gravity in her eyes makes no sense to me, to her, this is a real issue and deserves some level of understanding that only a true friend can offer. I give that understanding freely and I rightly expect it back, but she needs to find her own strands of positive inspiration in her situation and move on, I can only offer my support and hope her sweater pills up from the rubbing.

Truth be known, it is up to each of us to find the inspiration and enlightenment that only genuine heartbreak and being on the bottom (wherever that is for you) can often bring. I have to search for attainable threads of hope HERE, in my chaotic home with screaming children, a biting puppy and no sexual conquests to speak of. And maybe I WOULD come back glowing with an aura of “radioactive bright” wisdom if I were able to fly off to Italy and eat gelato instead of the freezer burnt Blue Bell I inhale at the Seductress residence. But really, aren’t we more of a motivation and role model doing it the harder more realistic way?

They’re not going to produce a movie about me seeing a firefly and taking a moment to breathe in the simplicity of nature and the grandeur that is lost everyday by those not noticing it. Hollywood would never think it’s moving that watching my kids sleep still brings Goosebumps of amazement and a spiritual peace to me in the midst of my crumbling world. But I know, “finding myself” in the simple things will ultimately make those times that hit “exceptional” and “once in a lifetime” all the more prophetic to the wondrous paths that yet await each one of us.

Let’s eat, pray and love everyday, right where we are!

But when I do eventually fall to sleep as the Northern lit sky serenades me with it’s amazing light show or as I stare down a member of an animal species that only lives in the Galapagos Islands, I will still think of that little firefly and the sweetness of my children’s breath and know, I wasn’t really lost after all, and my frequent flyer miles or 7 pounds of pure carbohydrate padding, had absolutely nothing to do with it.

Tagged as: Guest Post, Monday Mavericks